The Three Week Mark

In the past 21 days a lot of stuff has happened. The overwhelming majority of it has been pretty damn good.

I'm not a big fan of counting days (forget that I just did it a second ago). It's distracting to take account of the time that's left before finishing this exchange. It just causes you to be worried that there isn't a long enough period to accomplish any substantial goals or that there's so much time left it's fine to relax.

Instead of going with the unnecessary stress or the tempting procrastination, I've been pushing forward with acquiring fluency in Danish. A lot. In the first few days conversing with strangers in the language often confused me and made me look like an idiot. Now it still stumbles me, and my vocabulary is less than a two year old's, but it's growing. My pronunciation is mostly understandable and the structure of the language makes sense. Fuck yeah.

On the first day my counselor and her family had me spend two nights in their home. They were welcoming and it was relaxing just getting to know them. I moved in with my first host family afterward. For now, instead of putting the spotlight on the specifics about my exchange (e.g. my host family, the house, the day-to-day stuff), let's get into broader territory.

Denmark's censorship is non-existent compared to the United States. A few teachers in my school don't hesitate to add a "fuck" or "shit" to emphasize a point. However, violent swearing or physical action is seriously disapproved of. Angry outbursts are met with frowns and head shakes. Trust me. Two weeks ago one of my first phones in Denmark, an artifact from 2007, stopped working at a train station I was unfamiliar with. My smartphone from America had some internal circuitry complication when I tried to use it here, so I was already feeling a little pissed off with having to downgrade. So when the archaeological wonder began to mess up all of a sudden, I loudly yelled "No!". The expressions of the onlookers when they heard me wasn't the best.

This kind of violence isn't in Denmark...anymore

People in general are also relatively comfortable with their bodies. Nudity and sex are seen as expected parts of life, nothing you should be ashamed of. Different types of sexuality are accepted here and women and men are equally respected. May do a post on that later.

The food is healthier and more filling in my opinion. Potatoes, meat, and beer are popular in this nation of approximately six million. Going to the gym and being fit is also encouraged, though the contradiction lies in the popularity of smoking here.

I am loving most of Denmark. So far I'd rather live here than in America. The downside is that my close friends (more like family) are in California. We can't have an insane adventure on a whim, along with breaking a law or two (a joke of course). I can't call them and trade some banter or play pool like we used to do. I've always appreciated that we could share our feelings with each other and exchange intellectual thoughts. Definitely miss it now.

So the loneliness sets in once in a while. But I like to move past it by going outside and finding activities. Why not say hi to someone and try some Danish? Or work out. Or read. Or make more friends at school and play a few sports, party, or maybe even do the Danish class work...eh...no. Besides the last one, the opportunities are endless.

From the 23rd to the 29th, I was at a camp meant for all of the exchange students in Denmark. We stayed at a sort of Danish boarding school in the northern part of the country. It accepts students from their teens to their 40's and was designed among other schools like it to teach practical topics without a grading system or tests. The students apply there for the sake of learning. There were also athletic facilities, a dance room, and a rock climbing/camping area. Pretty cool.

Tried out the rock climbing

Our camp involved six hours of Danish lessons almost everyday. We were given around four hours of free time daily and had a trip to Århus (Ore-hoos), Denmark's second largest city behind Copenhagen, or in Danish, København (Kooben-ow-in).

A view of Århus

Besides the classic touristy crap with pictures, it was great to walk around independently in a city for a few hours. And if someone got lost or was late to the bus, a train could easily be taken back to the school (love the public transportation system). Walking with a friend on the cobblestone roads into random places and following the river that flowed through the city was great.

The school was loaded with 160 students from several countries. I feel glad to say that I met some awesome people and got close with a few, enough to call them friends and hang out with them later. There were some tough parts to go through, but without them, the week wouldn't have been as memorable. I don't regret anything.

I have been going to school for two weeks. It's surprisingly similar to how American high school is, if you ignore calling your teachers by their first names, the swearing, going to the bathroom without asking (and overall more freedom and respect to students), and more. Okay, maybe it's significantly different if you look at it like that, but some students still sleep, browse Facebook, and feel excited about the partying to be done on the weekend.

The popular culture here doesn't dramatically differ from what's in the States, after all it's still the Western world, though that is something to be discussed another day.

Sorry I'm not describing anything in-depth, but it's gonna take a while before that's possible, months even. 

I want to continue seeing what's in this northern, Scandinavian country. And honestly, I don't really have control over what that will be. I just have to do my best with what's there and live the hell out of this year. That's it for tonight.

Top Picture Credit: Nelson L.  

Rising from the Down Days

The airport in Amsterdam was shockingly quiet. It seemed to be devoid of the loud drone one would expect to be bombarded with from the thousands of people rushing throughout the day. The countless voices and footsteps inexplicably amplified the calm ambiance of the airport. Being exhausted might have warped my senses enough look at everything that way.

Shoppers eyed the kiosks and stores, taking in the scents of the perfumes and looking for the best deals. Kids were squealing as their parents wheeled them around on baggage carts. A different language struck one's ear before being overtaken by another. Almost everybody moved in a random yet purposeful fashion. They gave the impression that they knew exactly what to do and when to do it.

I wasn't one of them. After more than thirty hours of waiting and flying, it was extremely difficult to muster any excitement for being hours away from Denmark. An episode of insomnia in the past few days turned the irritation into a seething anger and distress. And when you feel down, it's tempting to start dwelling on the negatives.

I did that for a while. The trip so far had been pretty simple, but in this airport I had several questions that nobody could answer. The worst was when I approached a group of people, hoping at least one person had some useful advice. After hearing my questions, they just smirked and laughed and walked away. Already confused, it hit me hard. Indignant. Fuming. Fists clenched. Pissed off. Any of these words could have described how I felt.

It was the perfect moment for a mental huddle. "Okay, those were some Grade A douche-bags, but it doesn't mean the next person will be. Keep trying." Repeating it helped me focus. Eventually I found some other exchange students and had my concerns addressed. Whew.

Still, my thoughts kept focusing on the douche-bags. I went for a small circuit around the airport and a quick meal. Maybe that'd make it better. At first I trudged past the gates and stores. The weariness was smacking me in the face. Then something sparked.

While in line for some food, someone close by caught my attention. A really beautiful girl. The urge to talk to her motivated me and I tapped her on the shoulder. I said the first thing that came to mind and we began a conversation. She turned out to be from Denmark, and we traded a couple of words in Danish. It wasn't the ideal chat, being jet lagged and looking crappy. Nevertheless it was great to go for it.

I was starting to feeling excited and sociable again. Getting to the front of the line, I messed up my order and didn't understand the cashier's Dutch accent. The guy next to me chuckled about it and I joined him. We then had a small discussion about how restaurants and fast food worked in European airports.

Cool, that wasn't so bad. They were friendly. I actually suggested to the Danish girl that we sit down and continue talking, and she said sure. We settled a place to meet, and I ran out for 30 seconds to check the flight monitor. When I came back, I couldn't locate her in the scramble of various people.

It wasn't a big deal. My attitude was perky from having fun with it all. Later a kind man offered to take my food tray to the trash after giving an enthusiastic greeting in Dutch and English. The weight was slowly being lifted.

Then I recalled the woman I met on the flight to Amsterdam. She was a French speaking nurse from Switzerland who had lived in Brazil and the Philippines for several years each. We went over philosophy, dating, movies, environmentalism, food and more during our time together. We built such a solid rapport that she invited me to stay with her family if I visited her someday.

Experiences like those made it worthwhile to put myself out there despite being in a foul mood or a mundane situation. It can be tough to press on when you're feeling upset, but you gain so much more from challenging yourself to actually get up and do something about it. Anybody can wallow. I often subconsciously seek the easiest and safest route in life, and then my conscious mind kicks in and tells me to stop being a such a weenie. Okay, it's not that simple of a process, more of a daunting undertaking that tests your resilience. You have to acknowledge your crappy feelings as well as that they're not permanent. They'll go away eventually, so it's more beneficial for you to move past them now. My social skills and relationships, with friends and strangers, who sometimes become new friends, have been seriously improved by maintaining that attitude.

Most human beings are sincere and kind. They'll provide what they can for you if you're willing to do the same. It was tough sticking with that thought in Amsterdam because my emotions were aggravating me, but it was the truth and will remain so.

I wanted to post this because it should be a handy tidbit to go back to in the next few months. Some of the days in our lives will suck, so we might as well reduce the suckiness by being more self-aware of ourselves and the world. 

The next post will be about my exchange in Denmark. It's been about six days since arriving there, and some cool stuff deserves to be mentioned. It should be fairly long, or short...whatever length it is, it should be interesting. You have a kinda sorta promise.

Photo Credit: Patrick Emerson